- 08:00:47: The only thing better than winning the lottery is winning the lottery the day after your divorce becomes final.
- 15:00:25: Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach a man to phish and he will steal your identity!
- 18:01:19: $100.00 off new DirecTV acct 4 BOTH of us! Call 877-4-100-EACH & give them acct number 26071932 (Michael Parisi).
- 22:00:24: Susan Boyle reminds me of computers. Whenever I see her, my cock goes Microsoft...
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