- 08:00:56: My ex says that I never solve my own problems. How do I prove him wrong?
- 15:00:41: If God didn't want us to burn fossil fuels, why did he make them flammable?!
- 15:12:25: .@Survivor_Tweet #NowOnWed is not a big deal. It's where u started & where u should've stayed. I could've been a Friends fan if u did!
- 16:32:49: Oh shit! Are we not central time?! I missed the cutoff!! :-(
- 20:26:01: Just saw a freeway billboard for an epilepsy study. No one with uncontrolled epilepsy will be driving to see that!
- 22:02:22: I should just change my name to Help so the judge will believe they were screaming my name during sex...
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